I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
My dick has a subreddit
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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