White coat. Heels.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
