we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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