their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
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