yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
