did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
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