But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize