dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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