well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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