this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
