thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
