I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Randomize
