Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Randomize
