You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
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