# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
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