hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
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