I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Randomize
