Well apparently he's into motor boating.
can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize