He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
