I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Randomize
