alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
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