He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Randomize
