God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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