Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(609): View more from New Jersey

He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.

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(847): View more from Illinois

my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.

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(850): View more from Florida

He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.

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(734): View more from Michigan

you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.

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(303): View more from Colorado

doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts

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(480): View more from Arizona

Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates

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(860): View more from Connecticut

There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.

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