Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
People with herpes should wear stickers.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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