so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
