I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
