You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Randomize
