16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
