Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Well apparently he's into motor boating.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Randomize
