As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Randomize
