he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
