I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
