the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
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