kristin has been a bad kristin
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Randomize
