why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
