Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize