just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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