U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
