Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Randomize
