The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
