Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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