school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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