Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
