no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
