Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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