The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
