The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
