I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
