Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
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